A lament for my former life

Okay, so I lied. I thought that would be my only post this week. Then my husband came home with the following news:

"Doug [a coworker] was trying to give away free tickets to see Bobby tonight, and he couldn't find any takers."

Let us examine that statement, shall we? One of the most-talked about films of the year, starring a bazillion people, that isn't even supposed to be in wide release until Thursday/Friday, with Oscar written all over it, and free tickets are available, and no one wants them?!?! Well, that's not true. DH wanted them, and he knew I would give anything for them, but there was nothing we could do. Too late to get a sitter, and too much to do tonight even if we could find one. Now, if it was packing just for us, we would have thrown stuff in a suitcase and made a night out of it at the theater. But packing for Luke is quite a bit more complicated, including burning his own custimized DVD of favorite shows (Blue's Clues, Sesame Street, Tom and Jerry, Bear in the Big Blue House, and (don't laugh) Good Eats; actually been working on it off and on all day). If only it were 3 years ago, if only we had a sitter, if only I didn't feel compelled not to abandon my husband and go anyway, if only I didn't feel the need to burn this DVD so that my son will have something to keep him on routine in the mornings and evenings (he doesn't watch each of those every day, BTW, just a selection of 1-2). If only....

But instead I am sitting here, folding size 3T clothes into a suitcase, collecting up some of his favorite toys, some for in the car and others for after we get there, watching some DVR'd poker while Blue's Clues is being burned to DVD. It's not that I regret my life as it is, but I sure do (occasionally) miss that "drop everything and go if you want" possibility that my "old life" held.

Currently feeling: wistful