Monday, October 29, 2007

Is this a panic attack?

Every time I even think of trying to put him to bed tonight, I feel like I am going to throw up. Every time I try to sleep, I hear him screaming and kicking and banging. I thought it was hard to sit through it last night. It is much harder to live with by the light of day. The sides of his hands were bruised this morning, and it broke my heart. I can't stop crying.

We tried the "stay in bed or I'll close the door" thing last night for over an hour, lengthening the amount of time the door stayed closed for each infraction. It didn't work; he thought it was a game (except when he was screaming and crying because the door was closed). Baby gates won't work because he can climb them. I do sincerely appreciate the suggestions, though.

Other than sleeping in his room with him or just letting him stay up as long as he wants, I don't know what else to do. I just know I cannot repeat what we did last night. I just can't.

Please pray for all of us tonight.

Currently feeling: there are no words


  1. Erin-
    My heart breaks with you. I will be praying.

  2. Oh, Erin, I'm so sorry. I'm feeling pangs here reading these posts and I don't even have a little one. Michael and I will say a special prayer for you guys tonight.


  3. Oh Erin. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Yeah, at this point I wouldn't leave him alone at night.

    Is he tired enough at night? Have you tried letting him stay up until he crashes? Maybe his bedtime needs to be readjusted again.

    Hug him a lot and tell him you love him, which I'm sure you're doing. My heart is breaking for you.

  4. Oh Erin, I'm so sorry. ((hugs)) and I'm crossing my fingers for you that this is just a phase that will soon pass.

  5. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this - I hope you all get some rest. I agree with Shalini about adjusting, but in our case, the earlier we go to bed, the easier she falls asleep (and the better she stays asleep).


  6. (((Erin))) Poor Luke. Poor you. It's all pretty upsetting. I felt a similar way (that panicky sick feeling) about people suggesting I do crying-it-out with DD - and that was without even *doing* it! I think if you're feeling that bad, you know it's not what you both need.

    It's so hard to know what to do though. I personally don't think the locked door would work for me, but on the other hand I'm not one to sleep in with my kids at that age either. How much can Luke communicate what he actually wants? How clearly does he understand if you try explaining things to him? Maybe you could draw a pictorial chart of what happens at bedtime (PJs, teeth, stories, cuddles, bed...), and he could follow it through with you each night? Offering him too many choices (lights on/off, crib/floor etc) might be confusing or too much stimulation for him.

    We always stuck to the same bedtime routine, even through that crappy stage, and the rule was if DS couldn't go to sleep/ wasn't tired, he could talk or sing to his teddies, but he had to stay in bed. But they're different kids, and clearly what works for one doesn't always work for all.

    Do you have a sleep-school kind of place in your city? I know people who have had amazing success with those places, mostly when their kids were babies, but some of the places help with older kids too.

    Or... what about having Luke stay with friends or relatives for a night... just to get yourself a good night's sleep and some fresh perspective? He'd probably be entirely different in a different place, too.

    Sorry. This got way long and rambly, and possibly not at all helpful. I just want you to know I'm thinking of you. Hugs, Mel.

  7. Oh hugs, hugs and more hugs to you all. I don't have any other suggestions but I have huge amounts of sympathy. If this plan is making everyone feel sick, then it probably isn't going to work. The only other thing I can think of is that Marcus has a favourite CD that we play each night and I told him I would stay with him for X number of songs then quietly leave. Over a number of months that number has dropped down to just one, which we stick with as part of the bedtime routine. I'm so so so sorry you're all going through this.


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